Frosh Composition
God Prefers Cash to Checks
For those Catholics who go to church every week, penance can be bought with a check. But those who attend only when we have reasons to pray would do better to carry hard-currency. This is no great secret in the catholic community. It was at an early age that I learned to distinguish between the varying levels of necessity associated with donating. Donation doesn’t buy miracles though. The bigger the secret for God to keep, the bigger the wad should be. And don’t try to wrap a big bill around several smaller ones to pawn it off as more than it is, it hasn’t worked for me yet.
The sermons are to stay for, but Sunday School detention ain’t. I find the confessionals to be close quartered and wouldn’t recommend them. There's an in-sermon meal but the portions are small. And don’t be surprised if the wine is watered down. Parking is cheap, and if you get there early the seats can be good too.
Then there is a retirement plan. Some folks say it includes round trip accommodations. I haven't seen brochures but I imagine it looks like Disney’s Magic Kingdom at Disneyland. The vocabulary is unique, laced with profanities and morals but it's got rhythm.
Finally, the attire is always impeccable. From the staff uniform there to the patronage dress, it ain’t hard to assume that God has wicked good taste.
God Prefers Cash to Checks
For those Catholics who go to church every week, penance can be bought with a check. But those who attend only when we have reasons to pray would do better to carry hard-currency. This is no great secret in the catholic community. It was at an early age that I learned to distinguish between the varying levels of necessity associated with donating. Donation doesn’t buy miracles though. The bigger the secret for God to keep, the bigger the wad should be. And don’t try to wrap a big bill around several smaller ones to pawn it off as more than it is, it hasn’t worked for me yet.
The sermons are to stay for, but Sunday School detention ain’t. I find the confessionals to be close quartered and wouldn’t recommend them. There's an in-sermon meal but the portions are small. And don’t be surprised if the wine is watered down. Parking is cheap, and if you get there early the seats can be good too.
Then there is a retirement plan. Some folks say it includes round trip accommodations. I haven't seen brochures but I imagine it looks like Disney’s Magic Kingdom at Disneyland. The vocabulary is unique, laced with profanities and morals but it's got rhythm.
Finally, the attire is always impeccable. From the staff uniform there to the patronage dress, it ain’t hard to assume that God has wicked good taste.
